Feelin' Good!

Over the past few days, the idea of having baby #2 on the way has been sinking in. I thought I would be more anxious, given our history, but actually, I'm just really excited! I just feel good about what is to come! I know there are no guarantees, but my goal is to enjoy this pregnancy as much as possible and to give this baby the healthiest start possible, regardless of how long he/she stays inside of me. I know that, on the off chance that baby should decide to come early, the healthier I have been the healthier and stronger he/she will be. But I feel good! :)
That being said, I know myself well enough to know that I won't feel so positive every day. Overall, I am a positive person, but I am also a realist. I imagine that most of the time I will feel happy and optimistic and good, but that, once in a while, the reality of the situation will overwhelm me. The possibilities may loom and I'll want to freak out. And because I want to deal with all of the emotions coming my way in the healthiest way possible, I have decided to work a therapist throughout my pregnancy to achieve that. My goal is to make an appointment to get established with someone in the near future, and then basically have them available so that I can make an appointment if needed. That way, when I do have the urge to freak out, I'll have some one to call and strategies to help me deal with it. I feel good about that decision, so now I just have to take the step of picking someone and making the call.
We have tried to simply explain what's going on to M. She's only two, so what she understands is pretty limited, but oh my gosh, it's so cute! When we told my Dad, we had her tell him, and she said, "Mama's pregnick!" We have been calling the baby Baby Squirt so that she has something to call it, and she pronounces is "Baby Gwert." In the morning and before bed we pray for baby to stay safe and grow big and strong, and the last two nights, when we were finished, she said, "I love Baby Gwert bunches and bunches!" That's a good way to bring tears to a mama's eyes! It just made my heart swell so big! I feel so blessed to be at a place in our lives where we can expand our family to four. I know it will be crazy, but it will also be so good!
On Monday morning, after finding out we were pregnant, I had three doctors to call: Dr P, who put me on the Clomid, Dr S, the RE, and Dr W, my MFM. I spoke with Dr P's nurse, who congratulated me and said she would let Dr P know. Then I called Dr S's office to cancel our infertility appointment. As much as I would have loved to go through with that appointment to get some questions answered, particularly about PCOS, I am so happy not to need it! I also called Dr W's office to set up my first prenatal appointment. For some reason, that had to be complicated. The first person who answered the phone sent me to the voicemail of someone who sets up new patient appointments because that's their policy for a new pregnancy, even though I'm an established patient. That person called back to update my information, but it was already up to date since I was just in there last month. The a third person, a nurse, called later to tell me that it's too early to do anything, but I should wait until I have missed my period be at least a week, which by my calculations is tomorrow, but by hers isn't until next Wednesday, 7/11. At that point, they will order blood work, see where my HCG levels are, and schedule my appoint and first ultrasound accordingly. That's all well and good, and I understand the reasoning behind it, but I sure would like to have an appointment on the books! I think I would just feel better knowing when that it is coming, but also, it would be nice logistically. My husband and I both have jobs that involve a lot of scheduling and, with notice, it's pretty easy to schedule around other things, but it's a lot harder without knowing in advance. Oh well, we'll make it work. :)
I'll leave you with the phrase that I have been repeating to myself and my husband daily. I warned him that he'll probably hear it a lot over the next nine months, but that I have to say it out loud. **This is going to be a long, healthy, perfect pregnancy!!!**